Mistakes. Over and over.

The biggest mistake I made was to let you near me. You tried. Very hard. And I, in my state of oblivion, heart torn into strips, allowed you that. Why did I not listen to the warning signals? Why did I not hit the emergency brakes? Why did I let you walk right into my life, mess it up over and twice, and then break my heart further into a million, million pieces? Shards of glass. Broken. Crushed. Tingling. Numbing. Does this give you joy? What did I do to you?

I was warned. Many times. But I took your word. Trusted. Wrongly. Didn't realise you could, or would, swing, from heart to heart. Fast. Too fast. My mistake. You were not like me. Never were. You were right. I assumed wrongly. Too wrongly, it was fatal.. drained me out. You said all the right things at all the right times. Temple.. fingertips.. movies.
Songs.. waves..
Ha.. Do I laugh, or do I cry?

What did I seem like to you? Another porcelain cinderella figurine? That talked when you wanted, laughed when you wanted. That made you smile, made your heart skip a beat, but then drew you out, for your eyes had wandered, and for that, smashed her fragile soul into pieces.
A good thing you did. And I am pleased.
You were a mistake. Are a mistake. And will always be.
Then why is it so hard to walk away from your lies and your cheating heart?

….

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20 Responses to “Mistakes. Over and over.”

  1. Hello Meera! Finally found ya blog.. You seem very down.. Is everything ok btw u n Krish?

  2. jane: hi! haha.. well. let’s not go there for now. :)

  3. “oruvan…oruvan muthalali, ulagil mattraven tholilalee.”

    “vidhiyay neenaipaven yemali….ATHAI VENDRU MOODIPAVEN ARIVALI!!!”

    I don’t know what is going on. But if you ever need to talk to someone, Im here! Just give me a call or drop me a message.

    Trust God.

  4. puli: hahaha thanks dear. :) but i think im okay.

  5. Hey, hope you feel ok soon! I’ll come give you a big crazy smile the next time i see you around campus =)

  6. ambiga: hehe thanks sweetheart! *mmmmwah!* it’s so nice to see you around school, love! finally you know. put a face to the name. :) *hug*

  7. Hello Hello Says:

    I hope u were not hurt by anyone. Stay strong okie!

  8. *hug* I love you darlingest! I wish I could be there with you, but I’m always here for you.

  9. :O
    where did my earlier comment go?
    :'(
    now double-sad.

    *hug, again*

  10. Eh! MY GOD! Now it’s there again!!!
    wasssup with that?
    aiyoh sorry for double, and now triple comment.
    but i shall hug you again anyway.

    *BIG HUG*

  11. anantya: hehehe akka, you’re really funny la. mmmmwah! *hug* *hug* *hug* love you!

    raji: i love you sweetheart, and really am missing you like crazy…

    hello hello: haha. that goes without saying, but i wil bounce back. need to recover from meera’s stupidity syndrome first. hehe

  12. Hi.. Looks like its something personal.. All ya blog fans seem worried abt you… Hope u feel better.. soon…

  13. Lavathena Says:

    *hug*

  14. jane: thanks sweetheart. it is personal. but i’ll be okay. :)

    lavathena: *hugggg*

  15. huggggggggg.
    let’s get married in india and be tai tais.
    mwahahaha.

  16. Aye, wen we fall, we pick ourselves up, and carry on..

    You’ll be fine.. Besides, you got my friend, mr guitar to entertain you after the exams..

    Hehe, take care..

  17. geet: haha yes. thats my new aim. time to give in our descriptions and horoscopes to some matchmaking website.

    karthik: hehe… yes. mr.guitar better had some new tunes. ;)

  18. Put up some pics..! :D

  19. jane: i still don’t know how to work this thing!! I’m trying desperately but all I get is a hodgepodge of HTML stuff and I just can’t seem to work it! ughhhhh. :( :( :(

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